What are your 3 core values?

Putting all of this together, you want three core values that build high-trust relationships in your work and personal lives, and can be unpacked into all the other important values. That brings us to the three core values that are critical for developing great relationships: Wisdom, Performance and Love.

petebowen.net - The Best 3 Core Values for Success at Work and in Life - PETE BOWEN

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In our last blog, we talked about three simple things you can do to build a great organizational culture.

The three steps were to:

Identify your core values Develop an ethos to practice your core values to create your culture Continually improve your core values, ethos and culture The point is that if you take each of your core values and transform them into 2-3 specific behaviors that practice that core value, you can intentionally create your organizational culture. You can align and synergize your culture so you get the best performance from your team. It’s simple. You become what you do, what you practice. If you practice 2-3 behaviors for each core value, your core values will become your culture.

That sounds good, but what core values should you choose? What are the right core values?

One organization I work with has nine core values and 30 corresponding statements. Another I know has six core values, but very few employees know them, much less intentionally use them. Are core values supposed to guide team behavior or function as little more than a public relations statement? Few companies transform the values into specific practices. Even fewer measure whether their values are being practiced or not.

So, what are the answers?

Let’s start by understanding the broader context around core values.

We know from earlier blogs that the key to success at work is having high-trust relationships with your team and with your clients. High-trust relationships with your team increases employee engagement and productivity. High-trust relationships with your customers brings more business. That means that you want to choose core values that build the highest-trust relationships with your team and customers. It gets better. Remember, you achieve Happiness in your personal life and success in your work life the same way: by developing high-quality, high-trust relationships with others. The same values that will bring you success in your personal life will bring you success in your work life. If you do it right, you’ll choose a single set of core values that cover success in all aspects of your life. If you choose a lot of core values, you get the advantage of a long, inclusive list of values. No values get left out. On the other hand, if you have too many core values, then the values lose strength because there are too many to learn and practice. Your average person is max’ed out at three core values. Three is the most people can understand and actively apply. To be most effective, limit yourself to three core values.

How do you balance a desire for a long list of values with a limit of three?

The answer is this: Choose three core values that can be easily unpacked into all the other values in your company and in life. Putting all of this together, you want three core values that build high-trust relationships in your work and personal lives, and can be unpacked into all the other important values. That brings us to the three core values that are critical for developing great relationships: Wisdom, Performance and Love.

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The Best 3 Core Values

Wisdom: Knowledge + Character

So, what is Wisdom? Wisdom is the combination of knowledge and character. That means that wisdom unpacks into knowledge and character. More specifically, wisdom is your knowledge of the Truth combined with your ability to live the Truth. It can be as simple as having the knowledge that cigarette smoking is bad for your health combined with the strength of character to avoid smoking. The more knowledge you develop about the Truth and the more you develop your character practicing that knowledge, the more wisdom you gain. It’s a continuously improving cycle. That’s why wisdom comes through experience. The more people trust your knowledge about something, the more they will follow you and the better your relationships. The more people trust your character—especially in difficult situations—the more they will follow you and the better your relationships. The knowledge you need depends on the role you play. If you’re a technician, then you need to have technical knowledge. If you’re a supervisor, you’re going to need to maximize your management knowledge. Management knowledge unpacks into knowledge about how to plan, communicate, handle HR issues, and more.

On the character side, let’s talk a bit about integrity.

Integrity is a very popular virtue, but most people can’t define it or confuse integrity and honesty. Integrity is different than honesty. Imagine the whole list of virtues as the hull of a boat. Integrity means that there are no leaks in that hull. When someone has integrity, it means they consistently live all the virtues with no leaks. If you want to describe great character in one word, that word would be integrity. Wisdom is a great core value because it naturally unpacks into knowledge and character—two things required to build high-trust relationships and achieve success.

Performance

The value of Performance is straightforward. You’ve got to perform.

A basketball player must make the shot. The salesperson must close the deal. The CFO must produce the financials. Managers must make their numbers. The tech must be able to fix the problem. A parent must be able to raise children. A friend must be there for you when you need them. The more people trust your ability to perform—especially under pressure—the better your relationships, performance and success.

Love as a Core Value

Finally, there is Love.

Think back to your younger days. Was there a teacher or coach or mentor who made a big difference in your life?

What did that person do that made that big difference? Was it teaching you a better way to solve an algebra equation? Was it teaching you to throw a ball better?

Probably not. That special person most likely made a difference in your life because they took the time to show you that they care about you. Love is, in many ways, the most important value to build high-trust relationships because love itself is a relationship.

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Some relationships are grounded in exercising Power over people.

Other relationships are transactional. You pay them. They give you labor in return. You get what you pay for, nothing more.

The best, highest-trust relationships are based in love.

The ancient Greeks had several ways to think about love.

Storge is the affectionate love you have for your family because they are family Philia is the brotherly-sisterly love you have for close friends. Think Phila-delphia—the City of Brotherly Love. Eros is love that is the very passionate, almost irrational love you have for another. Agape love is the deepest kind of love. Agape is when you are willing to fully sacrifice yourself for another. Think soldiers willing to die for each other on the battlefield or a parent willing to die for their child. Agape is the self-sacrificing love that our Creator has for each of us. If people know that you not only care about them but love them, you’ll get the deepest commitment and develop the highest-trust relationships possible.

Why use the word Love instead of Care?

Care is good, but its not as powerful as love. I think it’s is too easy to take care for granted. Care is convenient. We’re so familiar with care that we don’t need to talk about it. So, we won’t talk about it. The biggest push-back on using love is that it makes us feel uncomfortable. We’ve been raised to think that love is something that is supposed to be restricted to our private lives—not let into our work life. That’s why love makes us uncomfortable. Being uncomfortable with the word love means that we have to stop and talk about it. That discussion will make our teams and our people think about love and their relationships with each other.

Love is a deeper relationship. Love is the foundation for the highest-trust relationships. Why settle for care when you can get higher-trust relationships and better performance with love?

Finally, there’s a huge bonus to engaging Wisdom, Performance and Love as your core values.

Core Values and Leadership

Not only will these values give you the highest-trust relationships and the highest-performance teams, they will simultaneously build great leaders.

How is that?

Great leaders build high-performance teams by developing the highest-trust relationships with their people. The more people trust your Wisdom (Knowledge and Character), your ability to Perform under pressure, and that you Love them, they more they will follow you.

Whether you want them to follow you or not.

That puts you in the great position of being a high-performance leader in charge of a high-performance team.

Let me know what you think.

I’m Pete Bowen

petebowen.net - The Best 3 Core Values for Success at Work and in Life - PETE BOWEN

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