Prostate Restored
Photo by William  Fortunato Pexels Logo Photo: William Fortunato

Can a gynecologist tell the last time?

First, we want to reassure you that your gynecologist can NOT tell whether you've had sex, even during a pelvic (sometimes called gynecological) exam.

Can turmeric make you look younger?
Can turmeric make you look younger?

It's antioxidant - and so anti-aging Studies suggest that natural constituents of turmeric – especially curcumin – may possess particularly strong...

Read More »
Is Mens health Monthly?
Is Mens health Monthly?

Every month Men's Health magazine are on hand with all the tips and expert advice you'll ever need to get you into peak condition. A Men's Health...

Read More »

You Asked It: Can My Doctor Tell If I’ve Had Sex?

I’m 17 and I have an appointment with my gynecologist soon. Will she be able to tell during the pelvic exam that I’ve had sex with my boyfriend? My mom knows my gynecologist, so I don’t want her to know I’m sexually active. I’m really nervous about it. First, we’re sorry you’re feeling so nervous about seeing your gynecologist. Ideally, doctor’s appointments would always be stress-free, but we know that’s not always how they go. First, we want to reassure you that your gynecologist can NOT tell whether you’ve had sex, even during a pelvic (sometimes called gynecological) exam.

No one can tell whether you’ve had sex unless you tell them.

It’s a myth that doctors can tell whether someone with a vagina has had sex by whether their hymen is torn.As we’ve talked about before, the hymen is a thin bit of skin that partially covers the vaginal opening. During puberty, it becomes more elastic. When something is inserted into the vagina (like fingers, tampons, toys, or a penis), the hymen stretches like a rubber band. Over time, it often wears away entirely. Sometimes, the hymen does tear. This can be from sex, or from gymnastics or riding a bike or any number of other things. Having a torn hymen doesn’t necessarily mean someone has had sex. And often, it’s very hard or impossible to tell whether a hymen has been torn at all. Often, people’s hymens never tear—they just stretch. Even though your gynecologist won’t be able to tell whether you’ve had sex, it’s still important to talk openly and honestly about sex with them. This is so that they know whether to recommend STI testing, talk about birth control, and bring up other sexual health issues. This is also your opportunity to ask any other questions you have about your sexual health. Of course, it’s hard to be honest when you’re worried that your mom will find out you’re sexually active. If your mom will be there for the appointment, make sure you have some alone time with your doctor. Your gynecologist should ask your mom to leave the room for part of the appointment, so that you can talk with her alone. If she doesn’t, you could ask your mom to step out for a moment: “Hey Mom, is it ok if I talk to the doctor alone for a minute?” You could also talk to your mom before the appointment about having some time alone with your doctor. The good news is that what you talk about with your doctor is private and confidential. There are some exceptions (for example, if they think you’ll hurt yourself or someone else), but talking about sex is not one of them. This means that it would NOT be ok for your doctor to tell your mom or anyone else what you talk about during your appointment.

Should I feed or change diaper first?
Should I feed or change diaper first?

Change Before You Feed Change your baby before you change sides (or halfway through the bottle). This usually wakes babies up enough to get them to...

Read More »
What vitamin do men usually lack?
What vitamin do men usually lack?

A focus on a “you can't eat this” diet is not only very frustrating for men (and women) but it also sets us up for nutritional deficiencies. In...

Read More »

Ask your doctor about what’s confidential and what’s not.

They can tell you more specifics and answer any questions you have. If you feel comfortable, this could also be a great chance to talk about the specific worries you have about your mom, and hopefully get some reassurance that what’s said in the exam room stays in the exam room. If you don’t think you’ll be able to talk to your gynecologist about sex, think about seeing a different doctor. You could tell your mom that you don’t feel comfortable with having her friend as a gynecologist, and look for an alternative. In most states, many sexual health services (like birth control and STI testing) are confidential for minors (people who are under 18 and not yet considered adults). This means that you can get them without your parents knowing or giving permission. The specifics of the law depend on where you live. If you live in the United States, you can check out this handy chart from the Guttmacher Institute to see what services are confidential, or just ask your doctor. It’s common for young people to avoid telling their parents that they’re having sex. That’s completely understandable, especially if your parents have seemed uncomfortable talking about sex before, or have values about sex that you don’t share. However, if you feel at all comfortable, talking openly with your mom about this part of your life could help you feel supported and get the care you need. Learn more about how to talk to your mom about sex.

Do sons have the same blood type as their mothers?
Do sons have the same blood type as their mothers?

Neither of your parents has to have the same blood type as you. For example if one of your parents was AB+ and the other was O+, they could only...

Read More »
Can you drink alcohol after prostate removal?
Can you drink alcohol after prostate removal?

Abstaining from alcohol for several weeks after prostatectomy is recommended to avoid irritating the bladder. Drinking alcohol soon after...

Read More »
What can give you a false high blood pressure reading?
What can give you a false high blood pressure reading?

Acute meal ingestion, caffeine or nicotine use can all negatively affect BP readings, leading to errors in measurement accuracy. If the patient has...

Read More »
Can you live 25 years with prostate cancer?
Can you live 25 years with prostate cancer?

“This study proves that if a man's going to live 20-25 years and he's got intermediate prostate cancer, he has an opportunity to save his life,”...

Read More »